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One of my absolute favourite things to be asked is whether I have any advice for finding a therapist. This is because:

1. I’m a huge fan of mental health and people getting help and treatment.
2. I’m extremely honoured that people trust me to treat their question with care, to keep their confidence, and to provide good advice.
3. I really love telling people what to do.

I’ve been getting this question more frequently recently so I thought I’d write up a guide for easy reference. I’m located in Toronto, Canada, but most of this advice applies across the board. There’s also a list of self-guided resources at the bottom if you’re not quite ready to take that plunge.

Disclaimer: I have no professional training in health care of any variety. My credentials mainly consist of having had five therapists in four cities in two countries and interviewed many more, so I’ve done this a lot. Comments and suggestions super welcome.

I read 84 books this year ! Holy shit! That is more books than I have ever read in any previous year. Goodreads says that amounts to 25,596 pages and that sounds like a lot of pages. I attribute this mostly to the Toronto Public Library and its excellent and extensive ebook library, because I read 68 of those 84 books in the last seven months of 2018 after moving back to Toronto. Support your local public library, y’all. Also, I got a job in an office where after work I go home and don’t continue working forever, so that helps. Plus, I’m not running three other side projects at the same time. Aren’t you proud of me?

I know that practically every generation has thought that the end times were nigh, but it’s hard for me not to think that maybe this time we could be right. After all, we have Science now, more information than our brains were ever meant to absorb, and if I think too much about the bees and the coral reefs and the antibiotics and the cellphones in our hands and in our oceans and the borders and walls and cages and guns and bombs —

Toronto was my first view of Canada, a grey slushy view in the dead of March that called into question all of my parents’ decision-making capabilities in choosing to move here. After the idyll of a tiny German university town (complete with castle ruins!), nothing about this place that was too big and too loud and too cold made sense. It had giant box stores in the middle of the city and a downtown that wasn’t entirely dedicated to pedestrians. It was basically barbaric.

1. non-tech people trash talking tech products that don’t function perfectly as though tech were easy
2. tech people trash talking tech products that don’t function exactly the way they want them to as though tech were easy
3. non-tech people citing Arthur C Clarke’s “sufficiently advanced technology” quote as an excuse for wilful ignorance about the technical systems they use
4. tech people citing Arthur C Clarke’s “sufficiently advanced technology” quote as a justification for hostility and contempt towards their users
5. non-tech people rationalizing bad product decisions as though tech being hard were an excuse for mediocrity
6. tech people rationalizing bad ethical decisions as though tech being hard were an excuse for perpetuating social harm
7. non-tech people thinking the latest brand new disruptive app will generate enough cover to distract from the labour-hostile late-stage capitalist systems they’ve built
8. tech people latching onto universal basic income because it absolves them of the massive inequalities they’ve perpetuated
9. the macbook pro touchbar

it is possible I am in the wrong industry